Control – why do we think we need it?

If we could list the one thing that causes the most anger, the most frustration, the most dissatisfaction, and is the biggest barrier to success, it would be our need for control.

As people we have developed unhealthy definitions of control.  I have a plan to cover all possible instances.  He is able to deal with anything.  She is a total task master. 

Control does not mean being able to plan well or be able to deal with multiple tasks or inputs.  It means being able to predict and impact other people’s decisions, reactions, and moods.  

Why is it we think we can control other people?  Why do we want to?

Instead why not prepare for each task with an understanding that others will react.  Be ready for what common objections and reactions will be and be confident to address the ones you didn’t expect.  Did others see something you missed?  How can you adapt?

You will quickly realize the tait you seek to be successful, prepared and to achieve what you want is in fact adaptability and not control.  Learn to be able handle and adapt to what coworkers, friends, for and life in general throws at you and others will envy the control you have over you life.   That is until you let them in on our secret that control doesn’t exist.

To adaptability and beyond!